the problem with Galluntium Bedanticle


Galluntium Bedanticle has:

  • A jar
  • A shed
  • And time to think about both of them

Life wasn’t always like that. He used to wash clothes for a living. But that was long ago.

Well, not quite -he stopped three days ago.
On the evening before the storm.

‘I’m gonna stay out and see if Maghera is right, and The Guth exists’, he told colleagues at the laundry.

‘Don’t be foolish’, they replied, ‘that storm will bring Dubhsallagh down from the hills.’

But Galluntium Bedanticle didn’t listen. He just hid. And waited.

Soon the howling began.

Maghera stepped out of his shed holding a jar.

‘Go home devil. Or I’ll set The Guth on you’, roared Maghera.

The howling continued.

Galluntium watched as Maghera opened the jar.

‘What do you want?‘, echoed a voice.

‘A storm has brought Dubhsallagh here, Guth.’

  • Buildings shook
  • The laundry shook
  • Maghera’s shed shook
  • The ground under Galluntium Bedanticle shook

Then there was silence.

Maghera thanked The Guth, placed a lid on the jar, and walked back into his shed.

Galluntium Bedanticle didn’t take the time to wonder why Maghera lived in a shed.
Instead Galluntium walked over and kicked the shed door open.
‘Give me that jar so I can hold the power of The Guth’, he demanded.

‘Sure’, replied Maghera, ‘but you should know you’ll get no money from holding The Guth.’
Maghera paused.
‘But. People need clean clothes. If you like, we could swap lives. I can wash clothes, and you can hold The Guth.’
Galluntium agreed, and grabbed the jar.

He opened the lid.

Nothing happened.

‘Why does The Guth not appear to do my bidding?’

‘The Guth only controls Dubhsallagh, Galluntium. People have to do everything else. Goodbye.’

Galluntium was left with:

  • A glass jar
  • A shed
  • And time to think