Left, right, up

Conscript 8173d was angry: ‘visit a new planet and learn new skills me hole, get told how to walk by a brown nosing flute in red uniform is more like it.’

Martian Colonel Parstickle was frustrated: ‘Left. Right. Up. Do you have a problem?

‘No sir.’

Listen here 8173d. If there’s one thing Director Ontobonn likes, it’s formation walking, and I want to show him that I know what he likes. Walk up!

‘Can’t sir. Earth’s gravity prevents vertical walking.’

But the Director will have me killed if I don’t show him 3D marching.

‘Might be for the best sir.’