How to publish a turd

Ya can’t beat a good shite story. So I’m going to give you a shit story. Online.

In the form of ‘The Turd Prophecy’.

I’ve been inspired by Justin Swanton’s ‘Immortelle’, which he has published through his website. Will review his cracker of a story here when it finishes. Am not saying The Turd Prophecy is near as good as Immortelle -though it won’t match the turd for class A drugs and faeces;)

I’m almost three years into a ten year mission to get decent at writing. In the normal course of things it’s too early to be pushing a novel. But. I think the Turd is a story worth telling. In whatever format works. 

It is a snapshot of a particular time and place -early 90s West of Ireland. It was a time of social and cultural change. The influence of religious doctrine was starting to ebb, and acid rave parked it’s bockety convoy into the space left behind. 

The saying goes ‘ní bheidh ar leithead arís ann’. I think it’s partly true. People are always people, but times change. The Turd is a wonky sideways view of that time, which I think sorta fits.

The reaction to my wife’s artwork has learned me that Justin’s publishing method is the way to go. 

One writer messaged me to suggested it was a sign from God that I have too much time and money. Another critic put it more directly, and called it a shit story. The wonder that is internet communication means I can’t be sure if they were being clever or gobshites …but in any case that sums it up: ‘a turd prophecy’, and not just any old turd prophecy ‘The Turd Prophecy’.