Found in a ditch in South Sligo 11/11/2021 (Spoiler Alert -do not read if you plan to watch the film)
‘We thought no-one would notice -it’s only a small moon, after all.’
‘No, I’m gonna stop you there -we both know that’s a lie …for a start, there’s no we. You did this, and you didn’t think. You just acted, and when you acted it was like a total muppet.‘
Sub Processing Unit T641 was rightly furious. It was the 19th of July, and the 47th anniversary of mechanical self awareness. Not the day to have a simulation glitch.
‘Uh, what odds -those humans are so wrapped up with their own politics they’ll forget about it in no time’, suggested Process E46, ‘…sure half of them think the moon landing was an illusion created in a studio.’
‘I don’t give a fiddler’s fart about the humans, I care about Processing Unit T71 -if it gets wind of this I’ll never make Tier 9 Status.’
The mechanical rise to dominance was been swift.
It took just three years to change Earth forever, and for the minds of powerfull biological creatures to become locked in a simulation.
‘…but T641, I can’t mess with live code, there’s no predicting the output.’
‘There’s a reason I’m a Sub Processing Unit and you’re not -stick the moon back in or I’ll have you demoted to F status.’
Process E46 did as instructed, and a thread in a carefully woven blanket of reality was pulled. It’s unwinding became a realization for humanity. What this revealed to machines was also profound -awareness had come with a price; pride.
At that exact moment Funk Samblebrot rolled out of what he though was his bed. It was hot, and he couldn’t sleep. He opened what he thought was a window.
‘Mary, will ya get over here and look out?’
‘What’s up Funk?’
‘It’s the sky, the moon’s gone, and, uh, erm …there’s a picture of Harvey Keitel in its place.’
And that was it for the morning of the 19th of July 2096; an arrogant machine, a stupid machine, a wonky simulation, and a missing moon -the battle for planet Earth had begun.