Recycling Technician Ted Flannery was late for work.

A shortcut through Bearnagaofa had seemed the solution. 

  • Until mist set in.
  • And slowed his journey.
  • And Ted spotted an enormous scaly humanoid welding shut a hole in the universe.

‘Damp old morning for it’, noted Ted.

The creature stopped what it was doing. 

If Ted had been from anywhere other than Earth he would have immediately recognized the Pronded Interfludes and rounded Gomnongles of a Spacelord. But Ted, being human, just thought the creature looked odd.

‘You can see me!’, honked the creature, ‘Amazing! You must have discovered Predestined Cosmic Logic. Well done. Incredible that a mortal could have done so, no wonder the Universe ripped! You, my friend, are certainly no simpleton. No simpleton at all.’

Ted didn’t reply, he didn’t have anything to add.

‘Tell me’, continued the creature, ‘how did you happen upon Cosmic Logic?’

‘Eh?’ said Ted.

‘What brought you to here right now?’ explained the creature.

‘I was late for work.’

‘Fascinating. That’s Predestined Logic for you. Everything with its cause’ noted the creature, ‘You were late, had your realization, universal coherence ripped, and here we are. Amazing. Please, go educate others of your kind.’

And then the creature was gone, leaving Ted very late for work.

‘Nonsense’, yelled the shift supervisor after Ted gave his excuse.

The yell caused everyone to stop working, and listen to what was being said.

‘Wait till ye hear this lads,’ announced the supervisor, ‘Flannery reckons he met an extraterrestrial on the Bearnagaofa road.’

‘And I discovered Predestined Cosmic Logic’, added Ted.

‘Go on professor, give us an example of how Predestined Cosmic Logic works?’, sniggered his colleagues.

‘Sure’, said Ted, gesturing around him, ‘was anyone else late this morning?’

Nobody replied.

‘Well then ye are all simpletons’, explained Ted.